Seeking God's Will...

How do you get a definite answer from God? I believe that He wants me at Spring Arbor. Obviously, whether or not I get accepted is a good indicator, but I got accepted at Flint, and that fell through because He didn't want me there. I have a FAFSA processed, am finishing my GED, and Spring Arbor has said they will work with me, meaning that it's not a problem if my GED scores don't get there until early August, it won't be too late. However if/when I get accepted, I want to know that it's what God has for me. That it's where He wants me. I don't want to go there and be miserable because I didn't seek His will and didn't go where He wanted me. I hate being so afraid of taking the wrong step because I'm still not sure how God speaks to me, how He gives me definite answers. I will say one thing, doors seem to be opening more easily for SAU than they did for Flint. Also, I've heard the same Bible verse repeatedly through different, separate outlets... altogether I think six times in the last three days. Romans 8:28... I like how The Message puts it:

• ^26-28Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

I believe that He can, will, and IS working this for something good. But how do you change that sentence, "I believe SAU is where God wants me" to "I KNOW SAU is where God has called me, and I'm going"? Good news about my FAFSA, in any case... my EFC was calculated as $0 so I'm eligible for a LOT of Pell Grants, Work Study, and Low-Interest Loans. I was happy to hear that. :)

Notes from a Bible reading...

So in reading James 4 and 1 Peter 5 last night, I thought I'd take some notes with points and questions and put them up here so that you can look over them. They're disjointed, much like my brain is, but I had a pretty cool epiphany at the end of my study last night, so stay with me. :)

• James was writing to Christians scattered throughout the Roman empire. His letter was more like a short book of instructions on daily living.
• James 4 warns against friendship with the world.
  
• James believed that faith lead to deed. Without action, faith is dead.

• "Resist the devil. Surrender to God."

1. I've found I have such a hard time letting go... surrendering.
2. "The closer I draw to God, the closer He will draw to me." What does that mean?
3. "Purify your hearts, you people who can't make up your mind." What does James mean by this i.e. make up your mind about what? Your own salvation? Your obedience?
   
4. At first I was confused about verse 9. I thought it was contradictory towards every passage that tells you to rejoice and be joyful. But is it about truly owning/feeling what you've done? Your helplessness without God?
   
5. I take it that verse 10 is a promise?

While reading 1 Peter 5, I began to realize that I REALLY needed a clearer definition of what the word "humble" meant. Since, after all, it is not a word the world uses in every day lingo, I've never really grasped the concept of the word. And here's where the epiphany comes in. I grabbed my trusty old dictionary and looked up the word "humble". And any word in the definition of "humble" that I needed a clearer definition of, I looked up, as well. Here's the list I came up with:

• Humble- marked by meekness or modesty
• Modest- placing a moderate estimate on one's abilities or worth
• Meek- showing patience and a gentle disposition; submissive
• Submit- to surrender to another's authority
• Surrender- to give up or to yield possession or power

Are you seeing the epiphany that was taking place? I slowly began to develop my own definition for humility. "Showing patience with God's timing. Giving up any power or possession of myself that I think I have to God's authority. Recognizing that my worth and abilities are defined and come to me only through Him. Without Him, I am nothing and can do nothing."

Love these lyrics

I heard a new Superchick song today and I loved the lyrics a lot. Here's what they say:

How long will this take?
How much can I go through?
My heart, my soul aches
I don't know what to do
I bend, but don't break
Somehow I'll get through
Cause I have You

And if I had to crawl
Well You'd crawl too
I stumble and I fall
Carry me through
The wonder of it all
Is You see me through

O Lord, where are you?
Do not forget me here
I cry in silence
Can you not see my tears

When all have left me
And hope has disappeared
You'll find me here





The best thing for me, I think, is knowing that no matter what I go through, He will see me through. I am never alone, even if it seems to be so. I bend, but I never break because He sees me through and He's always there. I put my purity ring back on last night and it's amazing what it does. When it sparkles up at me, it reminds me that I am not my own. I was bought with a price. When it catches my eye, it reminds me of the promises I have made to God, and it reminds me of who God is and what He can do. I'm never taking it off for more than five minutes EVER again. Haha.