I have a billion songs running through my head simultaneously.
Never underestimate my Jesus. You're telling me that there's no hope, I'm telling you you're wrong. Never underestimate my Jesus. When the world around you crumbles, He will be strong, He will be strong.
So I will dance with Cinderella while she is here in my arms. Cause I know something the prince never knew. I will dance with Cinderella, I don't wanna miss even one song. Cause all too soon, the clock will strike midnight. And she'll be gone.
I love you Lord, and I lift my voice. To worship You, all my soul rejoice. Take joy, my King, in what You hear. May it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ear.
You have shown my ever-wandering heart what love is. What on earth is more important than to have all of You? And I don't regret choosing You. And I'm not ashamed that it's You who holds my heart.
My heart is worshipping God right now. I may not be singing, I'm not even listening to music, but I am worshipping my King right now. He is amazing me every single day, and I find that I can't wait to wake up tomorrow and find out what He's got for me next. I am learning so much about this life and about love. God has shown me that I've been worrying too much over my friendship with Kyleigh. I need to release her to Him and just... let her go. I've held her too close for far too long. I need to let her go and let her grow up in her own time and allow God to work on her heart.
I have been praying for sometime now about a Discipleship Training. God is usually very quick to answer me when I pray, but I've been waiting for this one. I had gotten a little frustrated because He seems so near and ready to answer me on everything... but on this area, He seemed silent. I didn't know why. Saturday night, I had a conversation with my best friend from fourth to sixth grade, Danielle. She messaged me out of the blue on Facebook, with really no reason to. Well, I see NOW what the reason is, but hindsight is 20/20, no?
She texted me tonight and said, "You said something the other night on the phone about doing a DTS? Well RMC (Rockford Master's Commission), is having their Experience Weekend on the 12th through the 14th. Wanna come and check it out?"
I talked to her, she told me the details. I gave my parents the details and they gave their permission and their support. They also want, and I totally agree with this, for me to tell the church what's been going on and have them be in prayer. I can't imagine that I may have actually found what God wants for me to be doing. I know I could be getting the message wrong, but wouldn't it be cool if He's just revealed his plan for me to me? That'd be AWESOME!
There are some things I'd have to work out. I was already trying to quit smoking, so that's not an issue. I have a lady in the church supporting me and making me her cinnamon toothpicks that she made for her husband when he quit. I'd have to take my GED test, get a job, buy a car, even if it's a beater, have my surgery and get my health insurance back. All things I was planning on doing, anyway... just now I have a fire lit underneath me. :D
Would you mind being in prayer for this, Kim? I'm kinda overexcited, and I don't want to get too swept up in my emotions. I need the ability to remain objective to God's words and what He's speaking over my life.
Still... even if I don't end up going... cool experience, huh?!?
*happy Ashlee*
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Ashlee, something about reading this made a little piece of my heart come alive. I was just journaling to the Lord this morning about how I desired so much to have back a certain passion that I had to hear Him in the morning. I used to literally be a little giddy or excited when I thought about spending time with the Lord because I knew He would speak and that it would be such a wonderful time of blessing. It's not that I haven't had time with the Lord, but it has lacked that excitement and so I prayed this morning for it to return. Reading this made me excited to see that the desire was right and good as it resonated in my heart as I read this.
ReplyDeleteThat is the kind of desire that will produce growth quicker than you can imagine.
I am definitely praying about the Master's Commission and if it's what the Lord has for you. You keep the main thing the main thing and He'll surely show you where you're going. No worries, no fear.
You know, Kim, the first time I met you and talked with you, I rode home with my mom later that day and was telling her about our conversation. I told my mom, "I've never seen a person so passionate about what she believes. You can see it spilling out of her eyes and her smile and every pore of her being. It's infectious."
ReplyDeleteI still believe that. Your passion for God is infectious to people who meet and know you. They see your passion and they want it, just like me. Your willingness to be broken and humbled by God amazes me. I know your excitement will return because you're a person who delights in the Lord. :)
Thanks for praying. I've asked Him to help me not get swept away in emotion or the "sparkle" that I'm sure they're going to lay on thick while I'm there. Not that that's a bad thing, but they want people to apply so they're going to make it look extra attractive, just like a college visit. I've asked God to help me remain objective and neutral and to see any discrepancies in their teaching and preaching. :) Nine days 'til I go!
Thanks so much for your kind words Ashlee, you actually told me about that after the conversation with your mom (maybe you don't remember), but I do - so technically, thank you again.
ReplyDeleteI think that is really key - hold loosely to things, guard your heart even with the promises that God gives you. It's us that bring doubt and disappointment sometimes.
If He gives you a word, you obey. If He does not, then you still... hold loosely until He tells you otherwise.